Red and Blue make Purple

[Red and Blue make Purple]

[lenoreofraven]

Petty Nette

Chat: Hi Marinette,

Marinette: Do you want me to get my dad up here?

Chat: No, it’s kind of personal

Marinette: Oh ok. DAD!

Chat: Why? I said it was personal

Marinette: Sorry, since you rejected me in front of them rather than dealing with that personal matter in private thought you’d want them here now. 

_______________________

Marinette completes a full sketch book of designs if she akumatised. Outfit, powers, name, and even possible reasons.

Marinette: Hey ya Hawky, got a gift for you to celebrate one year since you first hit Paris

He collects it out of sheer curiosity. He starts plotting and sees it as an invitation…until the last page which simply reads: “Too bad you never can akumatise me or I’m not a baby or Lila. Also these I have all trademarked and copyrighted so if you use any you then owe me money”

________________________

Lila: What’s that on your book?

Marinette: Tally of how many days you have gone without being akumatised

Lila: Why is there only one dash above that line?

Marinette: That’s the tally of how much of what you said I’ve believed. You really aren’t going well

Lila: What did you believe?

Marinette: That you are Volpina

Lila: Was really expecting you just to say my name

Marinette: I’m still not convinced Lila Rossi is your real name

________________________

Alya: I know this sounds terrible but I hope we have something happen soon as the ladyblog hasn’t been updated in a while

Marinette: Maybe you could use this opportunity to fact check past posts as you have so much time

[Red and Blue make Purple]

[lenoreofraven]

Ladybug: Lucky Charm!

Giant camembert appears 

Ladybug: What the? How am I meant to use this?

Tikki: Sorry, it’s Plagg birthday figured was only way to create it 

Ladybug: We’re in the middle of an akuma fight

Tikki: Well this way we know Plagg will see it

Ladybug: But it’ll have to be destroyed so I can fix the damage

Tikki: No, it’s a palace for Plagg!

Ladybug: Couldn’t you just use your powers to create this?

Tikki: Last time I created a gift Mount Everest was formed and destroyed multiple towns

Ladybug: Seriously?

Tikki: And I may have also created Australia….you don’t want to know what was there beforehand

Ladybug: You created a continent?

Tikki: ….yes, I created a continent

[Red and Blue make Purple]

[lenoreofraven]

After weredad:

Lila: Ladybug and I are best friends

Marinette: I confessed to Chat, he came to my place for lunch, and we are now friends

Lila: Oh my god, you are such an attention seeker trying to one up me

Alya: Marinette that’s just petty and really low of you

Marinette: Really?

Lila: Can you even prove it?

Marinette: Chat wants a hamster, loves Ladybug, thinks we have the best macarons in Paris-

Chat Noir: And I’m right here! Although I had to turn down her confession as ladybug is my queen, Marinette will always be my princess.

___________________________

Bonus:

Lila: That’s clearly just Adrien in a chat noir outfit trying to help you save face

Chat: Oh no.

Marinette: No. That’s Chat Noir. Adrien had to go have a shower. You know what models are like. They are totally different people. They look nothing alike

Lila: Maybe hair and eyes are a bit different, but they are the same person. Height, hair colour, posture, voice

Marinette: Really Lila you have to stop lying

Lila: Is no one else seeing this?!

Nino: Lila I was on your side but that’s obviously Chat Noir. Next you’ll be saying Marinette is Ladybug.

Lila: Holy shit, Marinette is Ladybug.

[Red and Blue make Purple]

[lenoreofraven]

Marinette: Adrien, you look tired. Everything ok?

Adrien: Yeah, just stayed up late watching Baccano! so I could return the DVD to you

Lila: Really, Marinette, you’re getting Adrien to watch cartoons? Aren’t those for kids?

Adrien: Pardon?

Lila: Anime is for kids. I don’t get how anyone can watch that-

Adrien: That’s it. You crossed a line. Listen up everyone! Lila is a serial liar. She told me she was besties with Ladybug, but the hero barely knew her if anything hated her. *rants for a solid 5 minutes*

Lila: What just happened?

Marinette: You shouldn’t have insulted anime. It’s one of his favourite things. And Lila?

Lila: Yes?

Marinette: Please tell me how a show about a serial killer on a train, multiple literal murderers, mass murderers actually, and a sadist testing out the limits of a child’s immortality is something “for kids.” 

[Red and Blue make Purple]

[lenoreofraven]

People from Lila’s old class happen to see her walking with people from Bustier’s class. Old friends still believe her lies

Girl A: Lila?! It’s been too long! I would ask why you never called but guessing travelling on Jagged’s private jet makes time fly

Girl B: This girl is amazing! She once saved Clara’s dog from the runway as a plane was about to take off

Guy: Plus she is dating Chat Noir. Ladybug is so jealous of her

Alya:…..

Nino:……

Mylene:……

Alix: Hey, Lila?

Lila: Yeah

Alix:  I thought you travelled on Ali’s jet

Lila: I’ve been on both. Depends who is where

Alix: And saved Jagged’s cat from a runway

Lila: I spend a lot of time at airports. 

Alix: And you and Ladybug were besties?

Lila: We made up

Girl A: Has Lila ever told you about how she turned Adrien Agreste down and has modelled for Audrey Bourgeois in New York?!

Nino: That’s interesting because I could have sworn Adrien always tried to get away from you

Alya: And Chloe would have mentioned if you modelled for her mother

Girl A: Lila I finally brought that album covered you designed for Jagged! Still can’t believe that Marinette girl stole the credit. Do you mind signing it?

Alya: Seriously, Lila? 

Girl B: Lila, what’s going on? 

Nino: We’re Lila’s classmates from her new school and there’s some miscommunication. See, Adrien Agreste is my best friend and is in our class and avoids Lila like the plague. Chloe Bourgeois is also in the class. Marinette is in the class as well, my best friend, revealer of Lila’s lies and designed the glasses and album cover for Jagged Stone, babysits Nadja’s kid, and helped with the concept of Clara’s video so no, Lila didn’t design that cover.

Alya: And this is Alix, daughter of a Louvre curator. Mylene, daughter of the famous mine Fred Haprele. Nino, professional DJ. I’m-

Guy: Wait, are you Alya?! The girl Lila hired to be the face of the ladyblog while she did all the write ups and organised interviews and travelled?

Alya: Bitch you better not have

Truth gets revealed there to everyone and Lila learns that if you are going to lie, at least keep track of them.

[Red and Blue make Purple]

[lenoreofraven]

Marinette gets Lila one of those scratch off maps for Christmas. None of them will scratch off except for Italy and France

Lila: I think this is broken

Marinette: No, it’s one that only scratches off where you have actually been

_______________________

Chloe: As I am so gracious, I got everyone in the class a gift. Here you go Lie-la

Lila: Thanks….He’s just not that into you. Classy.

Chloe: I thought the book may be relevant to your current situation

Lila: I’m glad you liked the book so much you decided to pass your copy along to me. Though it’s a bit cheap gifting your old belongings 

_______________________

Bustier: Here you go Chloe, I got you a small gift. Thank you for being in my class this year

Marinette: Hold on!

Marinette scribbles on it

Marinette: There you go, now you can think of both of us!

Bustier: That wasn’t very nice. Apologise

Marinette: Oh, so when the rich blonde girl ruins my gift it’s ok and I get scolded, but when I do I get scolded?!

Bustier: Marinette

Marinette: It’s not permanent marker and will wipe off

_______________________

Ladybug bursts into the classroom

Ladybug: My good friend Marinette told me all about you guys and I remembered so many of you from your akumatisations! So I decided to drop in and wish you all happy holidays! For Alya…your gift is in the back row. For Chloe, I bee hair clip so you can have one you didn’t steal - don’t worry I won’t ask for it back. For Max, safety goggles so no napkins can hurt your precious eyes!

Nino: What about Lila as you are such good friends?

Ladybug: Lila….Oh! The girl akumatised like 3 times and works with hawkmoth and always lies! Seriously though Lie-la was an akuma name and bad pun, haha. Sorry, my bad. I got you an oyster shucker and parashoot so next time you get akumatised and defeated on top of the Eiffel Tower you can get yourself down

Adrien: Ladybug, isn’t that a little-

Ladybug: I’m sorry Adrien, you’re right I should have dealt with this better. Taken the highroad and all that. I guess there’s only one way to fix this - Lila, Adrien, here are two movie tickets for the Harry Potter marathon. They are showing the first 3 movies. I think the 9 hours together may just help Lila feel better

Adrien: ….I hate you so much right now

Ladybug: Oh, we finally going to say no? Take the highroad of polite rejection? Or are we going along with it so Lila’s feelings aren’t hurt?

Smirking Ladybug turns to leave

Adrien: Wait a second Ladybug.

Ladybug: Yes?

Adrien: Mistletoe.

Before she can react Adrien has planted a quick kiss on her lips

Ladybug: You win this round Agreste.

Adrien blushing but so proud of himself as Ladybug trips over her own feet trying to exit

Ladybug: How is that the highroad?!

[Red and Blue make Purple]

[lenoreofraven]

With the petty quartet stuff and Gabriel/Nathalie shipping Adrienette:

Adrien and Marinette finally go on an actual date. Gabriel akumatises someone to keep everyone away from the happy couple and make sure nothing can go wrong

Chloe sees a picture of Adrien and Marinette? Bam, photo erased off the internet and Chloe is locked in the hotel without a phone

Lila is about to walk around the corner? Suddenly she’s very far away and her lies of being in a different country are finally honest

Adrien fans trying to track him down? A very good look a like is signing photos at a random park very far away

Just anything that could possibly go wrong in suddenly fixed

_________________

Marinette: Gabe you look tired

Gabriel: You have absolutely no idea

Nathalie: How was your date?

Marinette: It was going good until Alya texted me with rumours of an akuma in Paris that was incredibly stealthy so we decided to head back to be safe. Anyway, I have to go

Nathalie: ….Gabriel

Gabriel: Yes?

Nathalie: Did you akumatise someone so those idiots could have the perfect date?

Gabriel: ….yes. But I called back my akuma now

Nathalie: I had already hired people to ensure those two were undisturbed

____________________

Ladybug: Chat did you find anything?

Chat: No, my lady

Ladybug: Maybe they were just rumours

chat: No, queen bee put out her signal and reception at the hotel was out

Ladybug: Overreacting maybe? Just an provider problem? Either way sucks

Chat: On a date or something 

Ladybug: Yeah, with this dense guy I’ve liked forever. He used to always say I was just a “good friend” despite touching me and other stuff. Maybe it’s a sign

Chat: Any guy who would dismiss you as just a “friend” is an idiot

Ladybug: For some reason I have this cringe urge.

____________________

Gabriel: How was your date with Marinette?

Adrien: Date? We were just-

Gabriel: Boy if you hurt that girl I will honestly throw you out on the street

Adrien: Oh so all this neglect was just building up to the official abandonment. Got it

Gabriel: I am not joking

Adrien: There are already a dozen roses waiting on her desk for her and here are some engagement rings I found online

Gabriel: Better.

____________________

Gabriel: Sorry again about your date. I heard more from Adrien

Marinette: Well, if someone had provided a good role model for what love looks like maybe things would be different.

[Red and Blue make Purple]

[lenoreofraven]

AU where Marinette and Adrien are betting on who will figure out Lila is lying first/last 

Marinette: I still reckon Nino’s going to figure it out. He just scolded me for eavesdropping but didn’t doubt what I say

Adrien: No, Alya does the ladyblog. As a journalist-

Marinette: When challenged she asked me for a source

Adrien: But Max has to figure it before Nino

Marinette: Lila convinced him a corner of a napkin, a scrunched up napkin, could scratch his eye open

Adrien: What about Mylene?

Marinette: Snapped at me for throwing a napkin

Meanwhile the rest of the class are going along with Lila as they are all betting on a) when will Adrienette happen and b) when Marinette will snap properly.

Max: How did she not call me an idiot when I went along with the napkin story? I’m wearing glasses!

Alya: Maybe she thought it was a joke? Still don’t know how I got away with ‘did you really think I would let you sit alone’ when that morning I had. She’s too nice

Nino: You asking for sources I was sure was going to get her to cross the line

Chloe: You are all fools. She put up with me for years, what Lila is doing is nothing. As I betted, she isn’t going to snap

Adrien: What are you guys talking about?

Nino: ah

Alya: um

Max: Weather?

Chloe: When Marinette is going to snap at Lila completely rather than just try to out her

Adrien: Give me 20 euro on a month and 10 on she’ll snap at me first

Adrien walks off to give his high road speech.

Adrien: Really thought I could have got that tenner today. Damn it. 

[Red and Blue make Purple]

[lenoreofraven]

Lila: So, I was talking with Jagged

Marinette: Cool story, but I have to tell you about how I met Santa Claus

Lila: Yeah right, next you’ll be saying you know god

Marinette: Well….I kind of control a mini god. She lives with me. 

Lila: Seriously? You sound delusional

Marinette: She is the spirit of creation, been around since the start of time. Eats all my sweets. Gave me a cool pendant though.

Tikki: Hello Liar! I’m the kwami of creation

Tikki then creates some random objects

Plagg: She also knows the god of destruction and I will turn you to ash if you continue bullying her

Lila: I don’t even know how I could beat that

Marinette: Don’t try. At least 3 other classmates have lesser gods as friends as well.

Tikki: And I’m sure Cronoo, the kwami of time, the first kwami would love to Marinette as well

Marinette:….Wait. Forget Lila for a second. There was a kwami before you?!

Tikki: Someone had to create time for there to be a start of the universe for me to have something to create. It’s a bit paradoxical though. 

Lila: Can we get back to how there are gods!!

[Red and Blue make Purple]

[lenoreofraven]

Hawkmoth: Did you…did you just grab my akuma?

Marinette: Sure did Hawky. 

Hawkmoth: I’m going to guess this is another vent session for you?

Marinette: Maybe…

Hawkmoth: Don’t you have friends you can do this with?

Marinette: You are just like everyone else never listening. OK, my ‘friends’ are kind of trash. They dismiss any negative feelings I may have as being related to a boy. Lila comes in with all her lies - by the way, I’ve met Jagged and he never had a cat - then just believe her

Hawkmoth: Huh-uh

Marinette: By the way, thanks for the Nine Nine recommendation. Totally worth it. But how dare you not tell me we’re in between seasons and that cliff hanger?

Hawkmoth: You watched it all in a week?

Marinette: Would have done it in 3 days but school apparently is a thing

Hawkmoth: There are 112 episodes

Marinette: That’s only 45 hours.

Hawkmoth: You have so much potential if you just-

Marinette: Did get me thinking. Why not akumatise a thief or a corrupt cop or someone who already had the skills to take a miraculous?

Hawkmoth: Usually if they’re competent they may just take it for themselves

Marinette: OK, ok, but surely that is still a better bet than, say, sending a baby

Hawkmoth: You are still on that?

Marinette: Seriously, why? And why twice? Why -

Hawkmoth: It’s about opportunity

Marinette: I miss the old you. Back when you were all ‘you have potential’ and ‘I’ll darken your heart.’ Now you’re just all ‘blah, blah, this conversation is boring blah blah’

Hawkmoth: If you aren’t going to let me akumatise you can I go?

Marinette: Can I just finish venting first?

Hawkmoth: …..Fine. But when I akumatise your parents next week it’s on you

Marinette: Nah, they won’t fall for it, but fine. Dad is annoying anyway. Last night Chat just crashes onto my roof and because I’m spooked I just tell him I love him. So dad sees this and decides to invite him to breakfast

Hawkmoth: So, you are venting because chat noir, the person I am trying to get the miraculous of, is coming to your house, completely relaxed, and you’ll be spending time with him?

Marinette: Yeah, like he’s a hero, surely he would have better things to do

Hawkmoth: You know that is-

Marinette: I know, I know, perfect little agent. Problem is you’ve shown more emotions means stronger powers and I’m not super negative or want to hurt him so at worst I would just be like, I don’t know, the Piratcy. A pirate taking away people’s privacy or some really lame pun. Then chat would defeat me because, well, you always lose even when you clearly spend months on a perfect plan because you forget lucky charm is a thing or to actually take the miraculous or don’t account for decoys. So, is it even worth trying?

Hawkmoth: You are my least favourite Parisian

Marinette: So…have any love advice? Netflix recommendations? Good french toast recipes?

Hawkmoth: ….

Marinette:…..

Hawkmoth: Just be honest, patient, and respect their wishes. The Good Place is amazing and A Series of Unfortunate Events has season 3 starting in two weeks. Egg, milk, cinnamon, a tiny dash of vanilla, a touch of sugar, use Challah bread thickly cut, cook in butter. Chocolate in the middle if you’re looking for something more

Marinette: Thanks Hawky. See you next week

Hawkmoth: Not if the season 1 finale gets you akumatised first

Marinette: If it does, I’m so going after your miraculous