Priceless

Alya: hey Ladybug I’m glad you trusted us with the Miraculi again but I have a question
Alya: why didn’t you give one to Lila? She’s your best friend, right?
Ladybug: I would rather throw myself off a bridge
Alya: oh, you don’t want her getting hurt in battle, that’s so sweet!
Ladybug: no, I would strangle her to death with my bare hands if I thought I could get away with it
Alya: But… She’s your… best friend…?
Ladybug: HOW MUCH MORE CLEARLY DO I HAVE TO SAY THAT I WANT THAT BITCH DEAD
and I’m wheezing



I ♡ U
My favorite Headcannon is if the Umbrella Scene didnt happen in Orgins because imagine:
•marinette just assumes Adrien is as bad as Chloe and just chooses to avoid him
•Adrien gets frustrated with Marinette dismissing him so he just decides she’s assumptive and stop trying to apologize
•Adrien complains to Nino about “stubborn Dupain-Cheng” and Nino is amused and suggests “yea and don’t you just hate how she smells like vanilla and strawberries” and Adrien is like “yea! and don’t get me started on-“ but stops and blushes because why must Nino expose him like this?
•marinette sometimes mocks Adrien to Tikki or Alya; “oh I’m Adrien Agreste; I’m gifted at the piano and fencing, blah blah blah” but doesn’t realize that’s she’s complimenting him constantly even though Alya tries to hint to her about it
•Adrien is lowkey calling out Marinette during class by saying to Bustier “some people can’t listen and forgive others” and Marinette just sits behind him and mocks him while he talks
•marienette tells bustier “well maybe if some people understood how to not do mean things in the first place or at least be sorry they would deserve an explanation
•we get lots of scenes where Marinette and Adrien are in each other’s faces, lots of sassy arguing and always them calling each other only by their last names
•meanwhile Chat and LB had revealed their crushes on each other way early on but Ladybug shut it down saying “I’m sorry but this is our job. We’re going on missions, not dates, we can’t be together Chat noir” they stop flirting and being romantic but they both secretly still have repressed feelings for each other
•ladybug and chat becomes a badass best friend duo (still pretty cannon)
•in Evillustator, Chat is annoyed about having to watch Marinette but just sucks it up and goes since Ladybug asked him to
•When Chat gets to her house Mari has a plate of passion fruit macaroons ready because she just so happens to be making them (or maybe it’s because Chat told ladybug he loves passion fruit on a missions once)
•Chat is shocked and weirded out by how sweet Mari is to his alter ego and wonders why she can’t be this nice to Adrien but just thinks it’s because chat is a hero and all
•Chat can’t help but make a snarky comment to Marinette (maybe because she mentioned a certain annoying Adrien to him) and she turns into Sassinette for a second and snatches his half eaten macaroon rom his hand saying she’ll give them back if he apologizes
•Mari and chat get really in each other’s faces and stare intensely seeing who will break first
•Chat leans back and inhales “Sorry, princess” & Marinette stares for a moment before smiling softly and giving his macaroon back “you’re forgiven, I’m sorry too”
•Chat meant to call Mari “princess” sarcastically but it makes her heart flutter anyways
•Chat wonders if only Marinette would let Adrien apologize whether it would be that easy to forgive
•Alya asks Mari about her time with Chat at the ends of the episodes and Adrien blushes as he heard Marinette go on about how cool he is
•in Horrificator, Adrienette are made the leads because Alya and Nino are attempting to get them to be friends and put an end to this stupid feud
•they freak out when they hear about the kiss
•in Animan, Nino himself invites Mari to the zoo but asks if Adrien will come for support since he’s nervous, Adrien doesn’t understand why Nino likes Marinette but he says “I’ll help you out but only because you’re helpless”
•little to Adriens knowledge this whole this is another elaborate plan from Alya and Nino to have Adrien & Marinette end up “alone” at the zoo together (Alya and Nino are secretly watching from afar)
•in Kung Food, Adrienette are both annoyed that Alya set them up but Mari genuinely needs help and Adrien does actually want to practice his Chinese
•when Chloe is racist tho Adrien calls her out and after Chloe leaves Adrien tells Mari “look I don’t like you, Dupain-Cheng. But no one deserves that treatment” and even reluctantly reveals to Marinette that Sifu does like her
•it’s quiet for a moment and marinette just kinda nudges him with her hand and whispers “thanks”
•Chat complains about this girl that is stubborn about not letting him apologize and he doesn’t know what to do, Ladybug tells him to find a common interest and try to bond with her
•Lb complains about this jerk in her class and chat says “why don’t you give him a chance and if he’s still a jerk I’ll handle him!”
•In Gamer, Mari signs up for the tournament because she knows she’s good and wants to rub it in Agrestes face (she didn’t know they would be partnered)
•marinette pulverized Adrien but then they have to be partners and Adrien is gonna refuse at first but remember ladybugs suggestion so he decides to try it anyways
•marinette doesnt try to get out of the tournament because she’s trying to give Adrien a shot like Chat said to
•When adrien comes over Mari is panicking to get a bunch of chat noir stuff off her walls because she think Adrien will make fun of her
•the gaming scene is similar just a little more angsty and competitive and Mari still gives him her lucky charm but it’s because she feels bad since Adrien reveals he spends most time cooped up in his room at home with little free time and can only play the game alone and he’s not even that good at it
•the rest of the episodes goes pretty similar except instead of marinette saying “he’s always so over the top” When chat leaves her on the roof she tells Tikki “he’s so cool!”
•in Volpina, Marinette was just in the library for research and doesn’t want to follow Adrien but Tikki says she needs the book
•marinette realized Lila is lying about LB and the Fox miraculous but doesn’t say anything since she’s not jealous, she just hopes Agreste isn’t really that dumb
•the rest of the ep goes pretty similar but except it (the season finale) ends with the umbrella scene
•adrien says “look, today I found out this one person lied to me and I realized when people get wrong information it can lead to bad things so i just wanted to make sure you have all the right information” *gives the same umbrella scene explanation*
•marinette has a pretty similar reaction to cannon but she makes her acceptance of the apology verbal this time “I’m sorry I didn’t give you a chance to explain”
•Adrien says “see you tomorrow, Marinette” and leaves
•marinette stammers and tells Tikki “h-he called me marinette”
Max: hey Kim do you know why Paris is flooded again?
Kim: no? Why would I know that. This just kind of happens sometimes
Max: really? You can’t think of ONE reason?
Kim: …
Kim: FUCK I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ON A DATE
Max: THERE it is
- I know this has been used many times in fan work but I love this headcanon so much so don’t shoot
- Everything is the same as canon but:
- Adrien jumps every time he sees his own reflection as if seeing a stranger
- Flowers are not safe around Marinette because she will eat them as if it’s the most normal thing in the world
- Gabriel mainly eats liquid food because this dumb bastard forgets he has teeth which he can chew with (He slurped on grapes without realising and choked and I wish that killed him)
- Alya has a huge appreciation for meat in her diet and she gets cranky if she goes on without it for a day
- Nino becomes more introverted but when he’s with Alya, he’s very sweet
- Chloe can actually go on for a while without sleeping and her work ethic improves which gives everyone around her a heart attack cos jfc who is this girl and where did her lazy ass go?
- Adrien has pounced on pigeons by impulse as both Chat Noir and himself before releasing them with a sneeze
- Marinette gets cold very easily and during winter, she’s dead tired and freezing 24/7 that she needs at least 5 layers on before stepping outside otherwise she’ll drop and sleep (Her parents feared that she had narcolepsy)
- Both Chloe and Gabriel end up getting a sweet tooth to the point where they won’t touch their coffee unless it has at least 8 teaspoon of sugar
- Adrien loves physical contact, especially by Ladybug/Marinette and he is oblivious to personal space (Imagine him greeting Marinette with a tight hug, rubbing his cheeks against hers as if it’s the most normal thing ever, leaving her a blushing mess)
- During winter, Ladybug makes Chat Noir her personal radiator and he’s not allowed to leave her hand until patrol/the battle is over
- i.e:
“M'Lady your earrings are beeping. As much as I love cuddling, you have to let me go so that you don’t detransform in front of me.”
“No…too cold…five more minutes…”
“You don’t even have two minutes left!”
“Shhhh mon minou let me sleep…”
“No no. When we reveal our civilian identities to each other, I want it to happen in either a romantic scenario where you’re declaring your undying love for me or when I’m dying in your arms in an angsty battle. NOT when you’re a sleepy bug with no concept of time and common sense.”
- Sashimi is Adrien’s best friend and it grosses tf out of Nino
- Spiders scare Marinette shitless and Adrien is not allowed near them cos he will try and eat our wonderful eight legged buddies
- The cucumber trick always works on Adrien
- Alya refers to Nino, Marinette and Adrien as her pack
- Nino loves swimming, baths, even the rain. He doesn’t even swim tbh, he just floats in the water like he won the lottery whilst Adrien stays tf away from all that H20 nastiness
- Marinette is so energetic during spring that it’s so cute and everyone’s hearts melt cos she’s so adorable and precious and-
- Adrien is comically possessive and if he dislikes someone, he’s not afraid to show it
- Imagine Lila or Chloe trying to pull a move on him and he just drapes himself over Marinette saying: “I’m loyal to my owner.” With a shit eating grin
- Every Akuma, Lila, and a few times Chloe has been hissed at by Adrien/Chat Noir
- Marinette forgets that she can’t fly. Once as Ladybug she forgets about her yoyo and just jumps off a building expecting to fly off. She gave Chat Noir a cardiac arrest and he literally ran at Sonic speed to save the dumbass from going s p l a t
- And of course we have the purring. That’s pretty self explanatory
- Alya whimpers and can pull puppy eyes. Evil powers that are. Eviiiiiiil
- Chloe has honey in everything she eats it’s mad
- Bonus:
“Ahahah g-g-good joke Chaton! I’m not Marinette pffffft!”
“Princess. Only you smell like the Dupain Cheng Bakery and use Sakura shampoo and have lips smelling like strawberries.”
“Damn you and your heightened cat senses…”
“Damn me? YOU MADE ME FALL FOR YOU TWICE AND I THOUGHT I WAS AN UNLOYAL CAT FOR BEING IN LOVE WITH BOTH OF YOU ONLY TO REALISE YOU’RE BOTH THE SAME PERSON! I LOST MY BEAUTY SLEEP OVER THIS!”
“…whoops?”
Chat Noir: I made a marshmallow Ladybug. See? Her arms are crossed because she’s mad at marshmallow Chat for annoying her. You like it?
Marinette, choked up: It’s fine.