i wrote this a good while ago (before season 2) for a bigger project, but it doesn’t fit there anymore - i still quite like it though so here, have this little pining keith thing
keith
about lance ;
Affection
was a rare guest in Keith’s mind.
When
he saw Shiro again, affection felt like a knife in his stomach, and
in the days that followed, every time he looked at his old friend it
was as if someone twisted the hilt of the knife, driving it deeper. A
foreign object that would surely cause an infection if he didn’t pull
out the weapon and clean the wound.
He
didn’t know what to do with it, this emotion that had felt so natural
when he was little, but now it ate away at him like a parasite.
His
body craved it, revelled in Shiro’s gentle hand on his shoulder,
adored the feeling of Hunk’s arms around him, and happily cherished
Pidge’s hand on his arm as the youngest paladin wanted his attention
(why would anyone want his attention?). Even Coran and Allura’s stern
hands made his body uneasy with emotion.
He
craved it, yet despised it, needed it to survive, but recoiled at the
thought.
The
only one of his teammates who never really touched him was Lance. Of
course they would touch when they trained, and they often got very
close while bickering, but that was not the same. Everyone else would
occasionally show Keith physical affection, but Lance did not. Lance
would hug Pidge and Hunk, fist bump Shiro, wrap a casual arm around
Coran’s shoulder, touch Allura’s arm – but never Keith.
He
was grateful, but also oddly resentful. Because deep in the back of
his mind, he wanted Lance’s touch, just as he wanted the touches of
the other inhabitants of the castle. He didn’t like the feeling of
being singled out.
And
– as much as Lance irritated him and angered him beyond belief –
Keith found himself growing fond of the blue paladin’s presence.
Lance made everything brighter, lighter, bearable.
And
then, Lance had almost died, and Keith acted purely on impulse as he
offered his injured teammate his hand, and Lance had taken it,
wrapped his slender fingers around Keith’s grip, and Keith had felt
the warmth of Lance’s palm through their gloves, and they had looked
at each other, and Lance was the most beautiful thing Keith had ever
seen besides the picture of his birth mother, and his eyes were blue,
blue like the ocean -
And
then Allura said she wanted him in a healing pod, and Keith had tried
to help him stand. For a moment, Lance managed to walk on wobbly
legs, but then he had nearly fallen forward, his mind flickering on
and off. Keith was exhausted, but he put his free arm behind Lance’s
knees, and lifted him up until he was carrying him.
Lance
had instinctively looped his sleepy arms around Keith’s neck. He let
his head rest against Keith’s shoulder, and Keith was too tired to
flinch, too tired to let his mind race. Instead, he held Lance close
and carried him all the way to the infirmary, where Coran helped
place him in one of the pods.
His
neck felt cold without Lance’s arms there.
His
stomach felt cold when Lance didn’t remember it.
Things
returned to normal. Lance returned to being the only one who never
intentionally touched Keith.
But
now Keith knew.
He
knew that Lance was the most beautiful person in the entire universe,
and he couldn’t forget it, couldn’t force it out of his head as hard
as he tried. Lance was a puzzle put together from wonderful pieces.
His eyes, blue with small flecks of turquoise, his smile, wide and
inviting and safe and gorgeous, his hair framing his ears, his body,
so lanky, but with strong shoulders and a broad back – Keith
couldn’t forget any of it, even if he were dead.
He
found himself yearning to hold Lance again, to feel his arms around
him; anchoring and safe.
But
things continued, as they always had.