ok we all know in reality alya and nino were fucking in the closet, right?
right.
somehow plagg thought this would go better
AU where everything’s the same except tikki is slightly goofier
you CAN eat them but you SHOULDNT. thats true of most things though.
carapace, looking at an adrien agreste ad: what a little bitch
chat noir: i know right
carapace: excuse me, that’s my best friend you’re talking about, asshole
- Nino: Honestly, Adrien and Marinette are crazy similar.
- Alya: Really? In what way?
- Nino: They are always running, usually late to something, they can both be graceful yet clumsy. They both know fashion, love sweets. Both are crazy good at video games. They both get awkward around their crushes, constantly tired. Plus, they both want a hamster.
- Alya: Wow, I had no idea. When you put it like that, it makes it sound like they were made for each other. I wonder what is keeping them apart?
straight people: stop forcing sexuality on children, they’re too young to know what they like!!!
also straight people: he’s gonna break so many girls’ hearts someday!
straight people: wait till this one brings her first boyfriend home!
straight people: someday, when she has children of her own,
straight people: *watching a boy and girl baby together* oo i think he likes her!
Adrien: Damn, Marinette is way too hot to be single.
Nino: Then why don’t you go change that?
Marinette: Adrien, you look tired. Everything ok?
Adrien: Yeah, just stayed up late watching Baccano! so I could return the DVD to you
Lila: Really, Marinette, you’re getting Adrien to watch cartoons? Aren’t those for kids?
Adrien: Pardon?
Lila: Anime is for kids. I don’t get how anyone can watch that-
Adrien: That’s it. You crossed a line. Listen up everyone! Lila is a serial liar. She told me she was besties with Ladybug, but the hero barely knew her if anything hated her. *rants for a solid 5 minutes*
Lila: What just happened?
Marinette: You shouldn’t have insulted anime. It’s one of his favourite things. And Lila?
Lila: Yes?
Marinette: Please tell me how a show about a serial killer on a train, multiple literal murderers, mass murderers actually, and a sadist testing out the limits of a child’s immortality is something “for kids.”
People from Lila’s old class happen to see her walking with people from Bustier’s class. Old friends still believe her lies
Girl A: Lila?! It’s been too long! I would ask why you never called but guessing travelling on Jagged’s private jet makes time fly
Girl B: This girl is amazing! She once saved Clara’s dog from the runway as a plane was about to take off
Guy: Plus she is dating Chat Noir. Ladybug is so jealous of her
Alya:…..
Nino:……
Mylene:……
Alix: Hey, Lila?
Lila: Yeah
Alix: I thought you travelled on Ali’s jet
Lila: I’ve been on both. Depends who is where
Alix: And saved Jagged’s cat from a runway
Lila: I spend a lot of time at airports.
Alix: And you and Ladybug were besties?
Lila: We made up
Girl A: Has Lila ever told you about how she turned Adrien Agreste down and has modelled for Audrey Bourgeois in New York?!
Nino: That’s interesting because I could have sworn Adrien always tried to get away from you
Alya: And Chloe would have mentioned if you modelled for her mother
Girl A: Lila I finally brought that album covered you designed for Jagged! Still can’t believe that Marinette girl stole the credit. Do you mind signing it?
Alya: Seriously, Lila?
Girl B: Lila, what’s going on?
Nino: We’re Lila’s classmates from her new school and there’s some miscommunication. See, Adrien Agreste is my best friend and is in our class and avoids Lila like the plague. Chloe Bourgeois is also in the class. Marinette is in the class as well, my best friend, revealer of Lila’s lies and designed the glasses and album cover for Jagged Stone, babysits Nadja’s kid, and helped with the concept of Clara’s video so no, Lila didn’t design that cover.
Alya: And this is Alix, daughter of a Louvre curator. Mylene, daughter of the famous mine Fred Haprele. Nino, professional DJ. I’m-
Guy: Wait, are you Alya?! The girl Lila hired to be the face of the ladyblog while she did all the write ups and organised interviews and travelled?
Alya: Bitch you better not have
Truth gets revealed there to everyone and Lila learns that if you are going to lie, at least keep track of them.
ruinedchildhood