An assassin is really just a serial killer who takes requests.
Excuse you, they take commissions
“hey man can you kill this guy?”
“alright that will be 10k”
“ugh cant you just do it for the exposure? whatever you suck at murder anyway”
being in a public restroom and hearing someone shitting really loud
being in a public restroom
being in a public
being
people adding things 2 my posts
your posts
ur blog
u
IM LAUGHING SO HARD. I THREW MY PHONE SO I COULD BREATHE
you thinking that comment was necessary
thinking
wen u zoom in
I love this post
love
It just keeps getting better
overused captions
Tumblr’s new layout
tumblr
the internet
this is the only long ass post i’m ever going to reblog
Long ass posts
Ass
congratulations for making it to the end of this post.
the cover of a teen paranormal romance novel that’s been on clearance ever since the day it came out
idk this kind of reminds me of a mountain dew commercial? you know where they do kick flips on skateboards and set fire to wood and stuff. yeah. he’s the kid who does some sick tricks and then guzzles soda
that One Mandatory Scene in action movie trailers where the main character is facing off with the main villain but you don’t really see anything besides the main character’s pained face as the music grows quieter and quieter and then when it’s silent the villain says something evil and it rings throughout the room and you’re kind of like “oh shit, they’re going to die” but you haven’t really grasped the plot of the movie because it’s just a trailer
dream daddy (2017)
me: hey Poseidon whats with the pitchfork huh???? There’s a lot of hay to stack in the ocean huh??? fucking loser
me: *gets killed by a tsunami*
ruinedchildhood