I am a quality blog, i swear… *sweats*
I wake yo this, unsure what is going to happen and now I can’t stop laughing!!!!!
I am a quality blog, i swear… *sweats*
I wake yo this, unsure what is going to happen and now I can’t stop laughing!!!!!
Aries: “Welcome,” he said, shoving my hair hard, “to the butt room.”
Taurus: “No way,” I cried out orgasmically. “No way, no way, no way.”
Gemini: “When I woke up Christian Grey had somehow gotten an entire orange into my mouth.”
Cancer: “Say it,” he commanded. “Yankity Spankity.” “Louder.”
Leo: “He gently handcuffed me to the parking meter. “Bye.”
Virgo: “The helicopter was built for sex, I observed sexily. You could lie across the seats or recline them.”
Libra: “Christian Grey picked up the long black thing and started working my zone. It was bananas.”
Scorpio: “The sex feelings flooded my body like a charging herd of itty, bitty elephants. We’re talking small.”
Sagittarius: “Do I afraid you?” Christian Grey asked, licking his eyebrow.”
Capricorn: “It’s a Murphy Bed,” he explained. “Maybe one day we could leave it up and have sex in the walls.”
Aquarius: “Christian Grey mashed on my area with the meat of his hand. “Do you like that, you woman?”
Pisces: “Hey,” I asked “Didn’t you used to be a vampire?”
Source: [x]
THERE IS NO WAY ANY OF THESE ARE REAL IM SO MAD
these are actually real that’s honestly just how bad the book is
i like my women with curves. lots and lots of curves. in a sort of spiral shape maybe with ketchup. curly fries. i like curly fries.
When we talk about the fries and the shakes @artzypaw @phantomgrace
Omg @phantomgrace CALL NELA
Are fedoras really that bad?





YES YES THEY ARE
I don’t really believe this mumbo jumbo
I mean it’s a goddamn hat.
Right..?
The white rose, it symbolizes the unique beauty of all the women who wish not to be with a nice guy such as myse-
I wonder if this works with other kinds of hat…
Nothing ventured, nothing gained…
WHEEEN THE MOON HITS YOUR EYE LIKE A BIG PIZZA PIE THAT’S AMORREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Men of Tumblr are my favorite kind of people…
wait, does that mean?


oh boy…….




Luckily, this nonsense doesn’t work on girls.

Observe…


IT’S GOTTEN BETTER!
This post is immaculate
It can’t be true.

And it can’t possibly work on motorcycle helmets.

I must test it.

Nothing happening so far…







HOLY SHIT IT WORKS

What in the world?

Oh why not? This should be interesting.

Here we go!

Were all mad here in Underland!

What the hell! Never Again!

… Actually …

One more time.

Alright, I gotta try this!

Can’t be that bad!


….

…oh my god…
This is one of my favourite things to look at
holy shit this stuff is back
The Gravity Falls one though

i wonder if it works for flower crowns?

here goes nothin-


w HAT THE

DID I JUST-

WHAT THE FUCK
oh man, some new ones popped up in here. excellent.
this post… is tumblr
no way this is 6 seconds only
6 seconds of pure beauty
I’m on the verge of crying
being in a public restroom and hearing someone shitting really loud
being in a public restroom
being in a public
being
people adding things 2 my posts
your posts
ur blog
u
IM LAUGHING SO HARD. I THREW MY PHONE SO I COULD BREATHE
you thinking that comment was necessary
thinking

wen u zoom in

I love this post
love

It just keeps getting better
overused captions

Tumblr’s new layout

tumblr

the internet

this is the only long ass post i’m ever going to reblog
jó éjt :D
I’m crying and laughing so much. It’s just a sloppy asthma induced mess.
Purple Paladin Alluraaaaaaaa doodle
I don’t know why, but I always get Power Rangers confused with Voltron and I’m just like “ISNT THERE SUPPOSED TO BE A WHITE PALADIN”
bookworm4ever99 asked:
hogwartshousehabits answered:




@phantomgrace this is too great
SNAKE ME UP (SNAKE ME UP INSIDE)
I CAN’T SNAKE UP (SNAKE ME UP INSIDE)

SNAAAAAAAAAAAAKE MEEEEEEEEE